Bewitched, Bothered, Bewildered

For me Summer has frankly been one huge disappointment so far. Months of cold wet weather followed by a respite that had me hoping…a week of thirty degree heat, I was all set for some fun.

Then the rain came back and I realised it’s almost August, so instead of remaining disappointed at the total lack of summer I’ve chosen to check out the inevitable stream of games coming this Autumn and Winter to cheer me up. It’s quite a long list this year which is excellent, so here’s my real favourites.

Hellboy: The Science of Evil - August.
While I’ve not seen a whole lot on this one, I’m simply interested in it as a Hellboy tie-in, though I hear it isn’t related to either film.

Lego Batman: The Videogame - September.
While not the Dark Knight game that’s apparently in development (and could have done with being developed in time for the movie, however never mind) this one will be joining my collection of lego videogames (Star Wars and Indiana Jones so far…)

Silent Hill: Homecoming - September.
Just what my Halloween will be needing, along with another good bout with BioShock. The Silent Hill series never fails to leave me with the shakes.

Star Wars: The Force Unleashed - September.
We’ve been eagerly awaiting this one for a long time, finally a Star Wars game done well (That is, since Knights of the Old Republic) which will actually make the Force almost as important as the lightsaber wielding.

Dead Space - October.
Joining BioShock and Silent Hill we have a non-franchised game apparently inspired by a cross between Doom and Event Horizon as you play a nameless, faceless survivor who wakes aboard a seemingly abandoned ship in the depths of space.

Ghostbusters - Autumn.
Originally intended as the official second sequal to the popular nineties franchise, I’ve heard rumours now that we may actually be getting a Ghostbusters 3 movie. Until that materialises though we finally get to don proton packs of our own in a game written by and starring Dan Aykroyd and Harold Ramis, along with Bill Murray and Ernie Hudson.

Mortal Kombat vs. DC Universe - Autumn.
The chance to play as Batman taking on Sub Zero? Who could pass it up?

Prince of Persia - Autumn.
My favourite series of games finally makes a long overdue appearance on the next generation consoles. I’ve played Persia since the days of my Pentium 286 and always been a fan of the revolutionary control systems.

Call of Duty 5: World at War - November.
Call of Duty 4 got me through the poorly timed two week Christmas recovery from an operation last year and Call of Duty 5 will see a return to the World War 2 battlefield that I so loved from the first two in the series. This one as pretty much a given.

World of Warcraft: Wrath of the Lich King - Not soon enough.
Needless to say, my most anticipated game of the year. I truly cannot wait to dig into my new Deathknight character as he cuts a swathe through Northrend. The beta information that’s been flooding out has been mouthwatering.

The Orange Wednesday ticket is all ready, tonight we’re off to see Transformers! I have to admit this was one film I actually wasn’t eager to see until I saw the trailer…for once a film which was sold to me purely on the basis of eye candy and action. I’m not saying my enjoying a film based purely on shallow aspects such as “It looks good and there’s loads of action” is rare (Take Die Hard for example), however for a cult show like this it is rare for me to come into it purely on this basis. I shall be sure to let you all know what I thought.

Speaking of cult followings, the teaser trailer for The Dark Knight was finally released onto the net in all it’s glory this week. As with all teasers, there’s almost nothing visually to get excited about, though there’s a rather nifty flashing of light which slowly illuminates the bat-symbol before turning into what seems to be an avalanche of destructive light blowing it apart. The audio is what is interesting, there’s a lot more of it than I’m used to from a teaser, and it revolves around a conversation between Bruce Wayne and Alfred. The conversation pretty much sums up the plot of the movie (though only in generalised terms) before a familiar voice chimes in…then breaks into psychotic laughter. Ledger does sound a little too much like Jack Nicholson for my liking though.

p.s. There’ll be far more about non-movie related themes after the cut.
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Twenty-five feels quite odd, if only for the amount of times my older sister commented on how much more mature and organised my friends are and I was actually getting all grownded up presents! Does this mean I’m no longer allowed to act like the boy who never grew up?

So what did I get for my birthday?

Flight Simulator X Deluxe Edition
I’m currently having serious issues with this game. Why? Is it barely an upgrade on the predecessor? Does it run badly? Nope, it had Product Activation. Microsoft’s newest Big Brother meets the Control Freak method of making sure you own your copy while simultaneously punishing you for any and all alterations you may make to the computer you install it on. I’ve spent all weekend finding out why it’s refusing to accept the product key which is correct only to find out I have to phone a national rate Microsoft number to activate my copy and even then they may advice I just send it back and get a new copy. What a waste of space.

Miami Vice
I’ve yet to see this one but all good birthdays in this household require a big action movie for the family to enjoy.

Clarkson : The Good The Bad The Ugly
Further feeding my petrolhead ways, Clarkson jets off to the US with the Stig in tow to once again sort the wonderous from the catastrophic (a’la Heaven and Hell) but this time with American cars.

Goldeneye : Ultimate Edition
I recently took to rebuilding my Bond collection as DVDs, expecially when I discovered the wonders that are the Ultimate Editions. This time round I’m making sure to avoid the duds (Goodbye Moore, you won’t be missed) and as I have Goldfinger (the #1 Bond film of all time) already, it’s time to put the Brosnan collection together. So here’s his debut, fresh from Remington Steele and free from the thought that he’d one day have to compete with Daniel Craig (who is fast becoming everyone’s favorite Bond it seems.)

T-shirt and shirt set from Fat Face
Yes I have to admit I’m a Fat Face kind of guy, so my sister used her intricate powers of fashion sense to get me a lovely green T-shirt matched with a white/beige striped shirt.

Battlefield 2142
Free from any type of Product Activation rubbish, Battlefield 2142 came out around the same time that I finally got Battlefield 2 working (it took me 6 months and turned out to be such a simple fix that it was just embarrassing.) I love all things Battlefield and around this time of year, during the quiet Christmas weeks, there’s no game I like more than simple mindless shoot-em-ups. Whether it’s Call of Duty or Battlefield, both are engrossing and entertaining and free from any real complexity, they give my reflexes a great workout (something I seem to be needing now I’m not airsofting.) This new one takes us into the future with all sorts of plasma weaponry and speedy vehicles along with a greatly improved variant on the old Helicopter (It’s faster and more maneuverable, even the passenger-only version.)

True Crime: Streets of LA (For the Playstation 2)
Thanks to Kevin, I’ve got myself a new PS2 game to save my Need for Speed addled mind. I’ve heard a lot of good things about this one but never got around to actually buying it, so I’ll let you know what it’s like when I get a chance to bung it on.

Can’t Cook, Want to Learn
Bod and Sarah decided to track down something that would come in handy for my new flat…Sarah was all apologetic that she couldn’t find anything allergy free (allergy free cook books are almost non-existent and almost always a pile of poo anyway) but I seem to have inherited my mother’s ability to ‘adapt’ recipes so I’m sure I can have some fun with those I do find I’m not all that compatible with.

Michael Crichton : Next
I’m Crichton mad so maybe with getting all these books this year I’ll actually teach myself to be a faster reader. Unlikely, but maybe.

The Magic of Pants
Magic tricks with underwear…the perfect way to entertain on Christmas Day.

Paul Smith ‘Extreme’ Smellies
Thanks to Jon for putting himself through smelling “like a tart’s handbag” to find something that smells nice, this would be officially my first ever all grown up present and I’ve already had quite a few “it should mask the smell” jokes. Do you think Jon and Jo were trying to hint at something?

512MB of DDR RAM
What a difference just 512MB can make, I’m running PC2700 (333 DDR) even though my machine can technically make it to 400Mhz ram…I have so much 333 in there now that it would cost far too much to upgrade the speed (faster ram would be clocked down to the speed of the slowest stick, hence 333.) Even the full Flight Sim X which I can run in 30 minute trial mode is running at medium level graphics settings with a healthy 20fps…the demo only achieved 10-15fps and is supposedly faster than the full game so go figure.

So all in all, thanks everyone! A great load of presents and a wonderful party afterwards, even if I’m getting far too old for Twister.

It was the early Nineties when I first stumbled on the shareware (read: free) levels of Doom, a game which by today’s standards is incredibly old-fashioned and in no way gory (’blood’ was a few red pixels on screen) however at the time it was shocking in it’s explicit nature. An 18 certificate was slapped on it, something which my Dad thought was so extreme for a game he loved that he eventually bought it for me and we played for years to come. Doom 2 followed, then on to the collectors packs designed to work under that new-fangled thing called Windows 95 (an operating system which shafted millions of Microsoft fans by providing horrifically minimal support for old DOS programs) and then Doom eventually slipped away with age, a game that none of us could consider playing anymore as a lot of the magic had been lost.

Enter Doom 3. The hype was well known to me, a hardware intensive computer game which was supposed to actually be scary…almost unheard of in games. It was new, I didn’t get it.
A year on and I finally found a bargain copy and started it up. There was the familiar UASC logo, the Mars station and the suggestion that the scientist who worked there were involved in sadistic and dangerous experiments with space/time. Modern technology means you touch down as a Marine signing on to a new posting, the scientists and other crew who work there no longer merely a random mention in the game’s manual but AI controlled beings who interact with you and who have hushed conversations in quiet corners which in the space of a few seconds fills you in on just the type of place you’ve arrived at. The facility is gorgeously modelled using realistic graphics which are actually realistic…which is when it hits you. The story plows into action and you realised you’ve been immersed in a horror movie, quite literally immersed, modern computing technology being such that in the heat of the action you have to use great willpower to remind yourself that you are just playing a game. Creatures crawl from the woodwork, survivors speak to you in desperation, the dead rise and all of this using the same suspenseful atmosphere that Half Life taught us to expect from a horror game.

In short…Doom 3 is scary. It’s a superb game, the narrative abilities of Half Life being drawn upon by some truly warped and freakish minds to create a story you can’t quite break yourself out of and the sofa isn’t there to hide behind anymore.

Just make sure you keep your gun loaded.